Guess my good mood couldn't last forever

Since leaving Copenhagen, I've continued to experience a certain degree of malaise. I spent the majority of Friday on trains, getting to southern Germany. That was fine. Pretty relaxing and peaceful. I finished reading Crime and Punishment.

When I arrived in Stuttgart, although it was pretty late and I was tired, I decided to seize the moment, and went to an Irish pub in Boblingen to hear Dave (Kirsten's dad) play some rock standards with his American band. This area of Germany hosts the headquarters of the US army for all of Europe. So there are a lot of Americans and English speakers running around. There is also a lot of crazy army propaganda on the radio and television. It's all pretty strange.

I had a nice time in the pub, though I spent the first set worrying about the fate of my giant backpack sitting near the door under the coat rack. Since experiencing theft so recently, I was trying to be especially cautious. But eventually I got to put that in the car, and I could loosen up, get a drink and chat with some of the locals. Finally there were some pleasant young men my own age! :) I had to argue with one of them about the merits of American culture, but it was good-natured. One of his parents is Libyan, so I can sort of understand his distaste.

I've been staying for the past few days with my friend Kirsten's family. They are super nice and accommodating, and I feel totally at home here. There are 8 year old triplets (two boys and a girl). They are very cute, sweet, intelligent and energetic. The weekend was actually quite exhausting just because they were so eager to play. But the whole time I've been here I've felt a bit morose. I think it's largely because everything reminds me of Kirsten and makes me miss her! And that leads to a more general sense of loneliness. I've also been trying to plan the next stage of my journey, which I think is going to be the most difficult.

Basically my plan for the next few weeks is: 1-2 days in Prague, couchsurfing with strangers; 1-2 in Vienna, staying with the friend of a UWC friend, 1-2 days in Budapest, staying in a hostel. Then I need to find a way into Bosnia (where my Eurail does not work, and neither does the translator button on the bus website), where I will be staying for a few days with some friends of my parents in the foreign service, posted to Sarajevo. The tourism website for Bosnia has tips on how to avoid land mines.

After I leave Bosnia, I want to travel along the Mediterranean coast; Italy to France to Spain. But I don't really know anyone in any of these places at the moment. Once I get to Spain I want to go to Morocco and spend some time in both of these countries, and choose one to setup in for a more extended period, renting an apartment and just taking care of myself for a few weeks. However, as this gets closer, it is starting to seem less feasible. It seems in many ways smarter to just stay here, where I can relax and have other people take care of me. But I am determined to press on. I am feeling travel weary and full of trepidation. But I know there is a lot of awesome stuff still out there to see and do, and I might as well try to enjoy it. I've started getting some responses from Couchsurfing.org, and I am hoping that turns out to be a great experience, and not awkward and stressful. I don't know why I'm feeling so negative, but I hope I am able to snap out of it.

I'm also annoyed that I have to pay train reservation fees everywhere I go. They've been around 10 dollars or more, each time, and each time I get really mad. My Eurail pass was really expensive to begin with and I kind of thought it meant I could just hop on trains whenever I felt like it. But a lot of options require reservations, and I don't know the system well enough to know if I will have a seat if I don't reserve one. Grrr. It just makes me grouchy. But I guess I just have to accept it and try not to let it bug me as much.

So anyway, I'm setting off into the great unknown at the crack of dawn tomorrow, albeit against my will and better judgement. Hopefully all these cities will prove so cool and beautiful that I will return to a more jovial, excited and enthusiastic state of mind.